How to Vacuum your Fridge.
March 31, 2008, 8:36 am
Filed under: daily | Tags: , ,

I found myself vacuuming my fridge this weekend. Not with a full sized sweeper, but with a dust buster. I realized it was time to oh, you know, prepare to move. And we hadn’t cleaned the fridge since oh, never. Gross, right? Oh well. Clean it I did. It is now so sparkling clean inside and out that you could probably eat in it, if you wanted. However, I found a layer of crumbs at the very bottom, under the produce drawers, and decided that vacuuming them up would be easier.

So I did. ROOMMATE! came in and laughed at me. If only we had a camera that had batteries. OH WELL. Use your imagination. Whatever you think it looked like, it probably did.

We got a lot done this weekend. Cleaning, packing, organizing, throwing stuff away (I believe in the SCORCHED EARTH policy of moving). And yet, after 9 hours of hard work on Saturday, I feel that the apartment is less organized than it was before.

And then, I found five dollars! Except, I actually did. In my book shelf. One has to wonder how that happened. One also has to wonder how my book collection has grown so much since I moved here 2 years. Oh wait, just kidding. I’m an English major, and a future librarian. I THINK IT’S PRETTY CLEAR HOW IT HAPPENED.

The next few weeks are going to involve:

1. Finishing up my undergraduate career. (NO FINALS, THOUGH!)

2. Moving (pick up keys on April 14th, begin to slowly move carloads of crap over, do all the furniture on the 19th, finish cleaning old apartment during finals week.

3. Turn 22 (APRIL 13th, MARK IT DOWN.)

4. Graduate (Bio ceremony on the 26th, English ceremony on the 27th)

5. Go home for a week, have a graduation party with The Family.

I also need to deal with my mother. She’s not dealing well with The Shacking Up of 2008. She knows better than to be explicitly pissed at me for it, but she is. She thinks I’m living in sin and making a mistake. Maybe I am. But her biggest concern isn’t that, it’s more what the rest of the world thinks of me and her. She thinks the rest of the world (coughTheFamilycough) thinks I’m a slut for doing this. And she thinks that they think that she’s a bad mother for allowing it. So, her method of dealing with it is calling me up and complaining about people asking her what I’m doing and how they don’t need to be so nosy, ZOMG. I have had to tell her repeatedly to breathe and go have a drink. I CANNOT DEAL WITH THE NUTTY.

Blah. I also need to figure out how I am going to finance graduate school? At least for the first semester? Blah.

hate. hate hate hate. hate. poo. there we go. blog blog blog, Internet Internet Internet. ANGRY NOISES.



BITCHIN’ day..
February 11, 2008, 7:27 pm
Filed under: daily | Tags: , , , , ,

8:30 am: Oh my lord, it is colder than a witch’s tit. Hot damn. Why do I love Pittsburgh so much?

10 am: Yay, we got the apartment! Yay!

2 pm: No, I will not look up your book for you. No, I will not show you every book in the reserve section for you. It’s not my fault that you don’t know the author, title, professor’s name, or course name, just that it’s blue. That’s not how libraries work! We don’t organize by color!

3:02 pm: We have to sign and put down the security deposit and first month’s rent by Wednesday. Nobody can go at night. They don’t show it before 6. BOOOO.

4:30 pm: Unless there is evidence in a text that says that a character is gay with homoerotic fuzzy feelings, it doesn’t exist. Saying that a character COULD be gay and just isn’t mentioning it because it’s the 13th century and he is a knight, and other people in the world have had homoerotic experiences that nobody else notices, DOES NOT WORK. You cannot argue in LITERATURE that a character is gay because other gay people exist. This is a fictional character. FICTIONAL. What does that mean, you might wonder? It means it is entirely made up. Imaginary. Fantasy. The author pulled the character straight out of his butt, and put him on paper. Therefore, the only facts we can ascribe to the character are those that were written down on paper. This is the same reason why Dumbledore isn’t gay, even if Rowling ‘outed’ him. She didn’t put it in the text in which he exists, so it’s not true. Truth in literature is that which is written. No more. You can try to interpret things, and explain characters based on a conglomeration of evidence provided in the text, and multiple interpretations might exist. But the interpretation that is based on what other people have done, maybe, is not valid.

Furthermore, when I argue that point, you don’t get to tell me that I’m “marginalizing the gay community” by not accepting that this character is gay. I know you’re Mr. Gay Pride, but really. Let it go! Not every character ever in the history of the English language is gay!

5:45 pm: I’m still mad! I’m not anti-gay people! I’m opposed to people seeing literature in a very narrow view point! Many interpretations are possible, but they must be supported in the text! I’M NOT ANTI-GAY JUST BECAUSE I’M STRAIGHT AND DISAGREE WITH YOU! Oh yea, I should print stuff out.

6:00 pm: Where’s my scarf? Where’s my lunch box? Shit shit shit shit.

6:02 pm: Oh good, I left my lunch box at the library. Where’s my scarf? Not in the bathroom, not in the classroom, not in the hallway. Shit shit shit. Crap. Crappity crap. SHIT. That is my Coach scarf! It is warm and wool and it matches my red coat so nicely! It is SO WARM. IT WAS EXPENSIVE. I don’t care that it was a present! Oh lordy, nobody’s going to pass a free Coach scarf up. I’m never seeing that thing again. My neck will be so cold. Poo.

6:03 pm: Still pissy about the gay guy! Ugh that pisses me off. And now we might lose the apartment. It is such a nice apartment. We’ll never find something quite that nice. Sigh.

6:04 pm: I should listen to my voicemail. Roommate’s girl called me? Roommate’s girl found my scarf! In the bathroom! She’s in the commons room! I just left the commons room! I LOVE ROOMMATE’S GIRL! SHE MY FAVORITE! MY NECK WILL BE WARM!

6:06 pm: I should call Mama! and bitch. That will make me feel better.

6:30 pm: And I’ll put the scarf out on the balcony. Single digit cold air should kill anything that it picked up in the bathroom.

6:44 pm: I should totally blog about my day. It was exciting and stressful. 8 am….