It’s Finals Time!
April 22, 2008, 10:47 am
Filed under: daily, Library | Tags: ,

And the living is easy?

No, I guess not.

During finals season, large quantities of students come out of the wood work and hole up in Hillman Library for days straight. They seem to forget the library is actually open during other portions of the semester, not JUST at finals.

I can only assume that they don’t know this, because what else could their excuse be for being such blatant novices when it comes to libraries?

So, I have a public service announcement to all patrons of the University of Pittsburgh’s Library System.

1. We do not have stationary supplies. We do not have: pens, pencils that are not golf pencils, paper, paper clips, staples, a stapler, highlighters, markers, glue, or tape. All of these things have been requested. BYOT: BRING YOUR OWN TOOLS!

2. Once again: THE LIBRARY IS NOT ORGANIZED BY COLOR! Is this really that common of a misconception?

3. No, you can not reserve study rooms or tables. No, I don’t know if there are any free tables on the 4th floor. Am I not on the 1st floor? Do I look like I am having an out of body experience? Go find out for yourself!

4. Your books are due on their due date. Even if you’re graduating. Really.

5. No, I can’t just watch your laptop/bookbag/pile of books/sundry belongings for a second. Do you really trust me JUST because I’m sitting behind a desk? FOOLS.

6. No, I still can’t get your books for you. No, I still can’t look them up for you. You are capable of using the computer AND retrieving them yourself. I have faith in you. I believe in you! I BELIEVE IN A CHANGE THAT WE CAN BELIEVE IN! Wait.. wrong speech.

And last, but not least: (I can only assume that this is a phenomenon specific to today): No, this is not where you vote. No, I don’t know where your polls are. Your voter’s registration information should tell you that. See? Right there? That address? That’s where you go. You don’t know where it is? Fine, I’ll look it up for you because I SUPPORT THE DEMOCRATIC PROCESS.

…and yes, I AM old enough to work at a university…?***

These are Pitt students? And they still say we’re moving up so fast in rankings? Sigh.

***Someone asked me, after harassing me about where he votes, if I’m actually old enough to work at a university. Possible responses include:

-No, I’m a child prodigy. I work here for fun.

-Yes, I am. I developed a super secret, morally-questionable lotion that keeps my skin dewey. That’s why I look so baby-faced. I’m actually 75. Works well, huh!

-No, I’m actually slave child labor. They have me chained to the library desk, forced to spend my days answering stupid questions and reading The Internet.

Instead, I said “…uh… yes?”


3 Comments so far
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Oh dear. I sympathise, I really do. I think the colour thing is universal, and I am shocked by the general inability to bring pens with you to the university campus. Even more worrying is when they come in to borrow a pen because they’re doing an exam in five minutes and forgot to bring any. Head, meet brick wall…

Comment by Singing Librarian

I hate when they ask for office supplies. They don’t even bother asking most times, they just take your pen and walk away. And at the first floor desk, if they need a scrap of paper, they take one of the date due stickers! Unacceptable!!! Then they have the nerve to get mad when you say you don’t have the items in question!! GAAHHH!!!!

Comment by Dan

lol @ #5

A color-coded library? Really?

Comment by Rachel

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